LIFE SUCKS BIG TIME.. (I guess)

i am so pissed off now.. i am in the sour mood rite now. a real sour one.. i shall be the one and only pessimist in band.. well.. who would care though.. like" damn, i have enough problems and getcha problems outta my life.. so SCRAM!" would be one sentence either of my frenz would say.. my swear word is dumbass... how interesting.. ¦b it is really the swear word i usually use and was the first to use it in the class.. mUahHahhaHhA... eRp.. as usual... all this typed out laughter still aint make me laughing.. cuz it aint funny.. trying to make up some toopid sentence and try to laugh at me own jokes. sucks. *bLaEhZ* suck totally. y does all mishaps happen to me..? why am i the one to suffer... "how i wish.." how u wish wat? ur arse wouldnt bleed so hard when u were having constipation..?! can u imagine me, lynn to be using all this crude remarks..?!?! cuz i am changing to be a freaking mean bitch... i am feeling so depressed and i need someone to get me outta the dark and lead me into the bright... but too bad all my bequests are the way it is.. it wont change... i am really growing to be a pessimist.. and i dun want to.. i wanna be the positive me.. the one who always advise pple to look on the bright side of life... ¦..( i am so sad.. so very very very sad.. anyway, wat i wrote yesterday has nothing to do with wat i am writing today... can u imagine..?!?! now i havta juggle 4 balls at the same time!!! aRgH.. this is getting nowhere... shud i simply juz end my life NOW? aint it betta..?! nobody cares bout me.. so wat purpose is there for me to live on...?! there is a saying tat goes "u dun live life for the sake of living it or urself. u live it for others who needs u." uh huh... i live life for the sake of living it lor... cuz i dun hav anyone who needs me.. i am insignificant.. i am eminent.. so why is there any more reason for me to live on..?! and a chinese proverb " do good and good will come in return (hao xing you hao bao) " i did good deeds.. like S.P.C.A cip day.. then practising all i could for the SYF... aint all this good deeds..? shud i like donate my kidney or lungs or half of my brain for those who needs it? is tat wat a good deed is..? i do everything in love.. but why aint the love coming back in return to me?! am i really tat detesable? *hNh!* life aint the way i want it to be.

*dePreSSeD kiD*~ LyNn
9:19 PM;





u r so very pissed off... aint those pple who betray and decieve u suck TOTALLY..?! they are inhumane to have toyed wif u... to think tat u have trusted them so much... so much tat u are in the midst of crying out loud and venting ur anger on ur pet... u thot all this were pure and true but it all turned out wrong in the end...all this were juz supreficial and artificial.. i am so pissed. to think tat this was something good... a tale about to come true.. aRgh... ¦..( i am so frustrated and upset.. i wished i only juggled 1 ball wif 2 hands instead of juggling 3 balls wif 2 hands and dropping all the balls on the floor.. aRgH... life is one tough obstacle to pass.. except for the fat tat... BAND GOT A DISTINCTION..! ¦l mUAhaAHhahHa..!!! all this typed out laughter aint helping me to smile at all.. it HURTS.. i cant believe this man.. it really hurts. i hate myself sometimes for being wat i am. but i love myself for knowing frens like all dudes and babes in band... some of my classmates... my family... but i hate it when i dissapoint my parents.. for getting real bad results.. god... why am i such a detestable fucker? i really hate it...!!! i wanna be loved by all... there is this saying " to be loved is to learn to love.." i already loved... why am i still not loved..?! arGh..?! i am a piece of shit on the ground and when pple step on me, they will feel pissed and disguisted... and YEAH! tat is wat i am... a hindrance and nuisance... *blaEhz* if only i would die and reincarnate to somebody betta.. someone of high personality... mUAhahHAHhah... which means i havta die now... bye pple... i am like "commiting suicide" ...

*depressed bitch*
11:54 PM;





it has kinda been annoying me since the day i kinda agreed... they had been making fun of me. and i dun like it. it aint funny at all.. i have blogged for a long time.. and i realised one zat's blog, he underlined my name to advise pple not to see my blog cuz it hasnt been updated for a looooong time.. mUahaHahah. THANKS LOR. ¦b *bLaEhX* mUahAHhahHAh.. now gueSS who is back on the blog..?! YEAH! ME...! LYNNETTE FU... DISTINCTION..MuahHAhhahA... happy. happy. happy. and i would really hope we would have the dinner!! then can partner wif Daryl!!! ROCK SIA... anyway, why is the blogger thingy different liaoz..?! so confusing lorz.. so sian.. so sleepy... gtg... bYe ppLe.. lOve yA loads!!! take care and god bless u real GOOD!
12:23 AM;





oh my gaw! it is since like 2 months since i updated!!! SORRY PEEPS! mUAhAhHAhah... well.. i have 2 joys to share wif all the pple who WILL READ my blog.. THE Temasek Wind Ensemble Got a Gold for SYF!!!! it is like 3 days ago since we got the gold.. BUT STILL!!! the happiness tat i am feeling now and will always feel will not be gone... it is my ever BIG THING to achieve at least some results... REAL GOOD RESULTS TOO... THE T.W.E ROCKS BIG TIME! second is... well... the guy i like, likes me!!! mUahAHhAhhahAH.. pple, dun ask me who... cuz u WONT know him... there has been negatives stuff revolving around me... but WHO CARES... all i have to think about is the ensemble tat went up the stage and... VAaAaaaAp! and wat tat came out was... music and passion... i can tell tat for those who cried really hard on the day they announced the gold were those tat worked really hard in their mistakes... and were glad tat we achieved a distinction tat we were dreaming for years... for those who did not cry were those who r stronger in both music and character... worked equally hard... and they knew tat we did it and there was nothing to be crying over for... it was a simply remarkable experience for me. i knew if i played a wrong note, we might straight away get a silver.. i was trembling all over... but i had control over it.. i knew we did pretty well for tales of the sea... so i turned over to timothy and smiled to him... all he gave me was the weak and nervous smile.. then i realised.. it wasnt only me who was really nervous.. almost everyone was.. i smiled to the judges.. mUAahAHhaha... i was trying to act calm.. i looked at the audience while playing American Riversongs.. i knew i shudnt have done tat but i wanted to see the reaction if they were moving like how i would usually move when i hear MUSIC.. u know music.. like wat we played on the SYF day.. i dunno whether the bandits are still happy tat we got a distinction... I AM! gosh.. it really has been a long distance since we took off and had a new instructor... all the unforgettable crying we had when mr chew said he din want to conduct us.. when i think of it... it juz makes me feel so upset.. WELL... it's the past.. juz hope the SYF in the next 2 years,the juniora, me and cat will/can/must/shall/may continue the distinction till forever!!! it has been a great being in band even though i am the weakest flautist in the main band... all the memorable stuffs tat i will not forget.. still very very very HAPPY!!! arGH... the stage, st.pats, the enemble playing... it juz cant be removed form my mind!!! hAhahhA.. gotta go all the way pple... dun get SWELL-HEADED!!! remember...

LOVE THE BANDITS LOADS, MY FAMILY and THE GUY I LIKE... mUAhhahAHhahHA... ;)
1:57 AM;